Sometimes in life, we experience a chapter of incidents that traumatize us or even plunge us into a state of depression. Some instances of such traumatic experiences can range from losing a loved one, separation in a marriage union, a heartbreak, the loss of a job or business venture, just to mention but a few. Traumatic experiences, whatever it is can devastate us as human beings emotionally. In life, we can encounter sorrow—a state of deep distress, sadness, or regret. It is a bog of despair that can draw one into its cryptic abyss of gloom and a possible eventual doom if not handled timely. Should we drown in this despondent bog? I would say, “No,” in my notebook. Sometimes, we may just need to learn to move forward. A Kristina McMorris once stated that “The whole world can become the enemy when you lose what you love.” This can pan out to be true if we do not take care. It is therefore imperative that we know we handle tough times when we experience them.
Watching my wife’s video as she tells the story of some of the tragedies that she has faced in life, plunges my mind back to the emotional storms and trials that she went through—it was not an easy road, to say the very least. Losing loved ones is a very severe and painful pill to swallow, especially at a very young age. For her, it was like passing through fire or the eye of a needle. It was a time of absolute grayness considering the fact of her situation—losing both of her parents. However, in all these things and through it all, as we (i.e., her loved ones and I) encouraged her to stand steady. She is slowly-but-surely learning to move forward. She is now channeling her emotions and energy towards helping others that have passed through a similar fate. Her experiences also cast my mind back at a loss I also experienced. Many years ago, I lost my immediate elder brother to kidney failure. Although I was quite young, it was also a sad moment. It was not a pleasant experience to say the very least. It was heart-wrenching to watch my mother sorrow over my late brother. I too had to learn to move forward from the loss.
“Stay focused on what is ahead. Keep your eyes on the mark. Don’t allow skepticism rob you of the potentials of your tomorrow. Learn to move forward. Forward ever, backward never.”
This video is very encouraging and has a message that we can all learn from. “Experience is life’s best teacher,” they say. Some of the happenings that we experience may be negative and could lead to a series of unpleasant emotions that could have a lasting impact on our lives. Hindsight makes us look back at all that we have faced. We begin to think of the “what if’s” and the “what-could-have-been.” We start to imagine what life could have been if we did not pass through those circumstances. When we drive, we look through our windshield to see ahead of us. As we maneuver our automotive, we peer through the rearview mirror to see what is behind us with a passing glance. However, our foremost concern is to focus on what is ahead of us in other to avoid a wreck. That is the reason why we have a wide front windshield and just a small mirror to give us a quick glance at what is behind us. As we move forward, we must learn to focus on what is ahead of us.
The moral of the video is to ensure that we are not just dwelling on the past, thinking about the “what if’s” and the “what-could-have-been.” As we saw in the analogy above, we drive our cars with a focus on what is ahead of us. We do not operate our automotive with our focus on the rearview mirror. Doing so puts us at risk of colliding with upcoming traffic or running off the road. On a similar note, we must learn to continue moving forward so that we do not wreck our present lives. Yes, we cannot erase the fact that we have experienced grief in our past. Sorrow could plunge us into a state of pessimism as we begin to look at life only from a negative perspective. An unknown author once said that “Pessimism is an investment in nothing; optimism is an investment in hope.” Dwelling in the past will make us lose sight of our present possibilities and experiences. When we look through the rearview mirror of life, it should spur us on forward. We must learn to hang on to our present hope for the sake of our possible future. Sometimes, we just must learn to move on with our lives.